I am feeling a lot of insecurity about this, and I am mad at myself about it.

I have beautiful friends who are in their 40's, 50's and 60's. Women still have babies and start lucrative and enjoyable second careers and find true love after forty. Kim Deal and Kim Gordon and Liz Phair and Suzanne Vega and Macy Gray and who knows who else still rock their asses off after forty. (I'm a little sick to find that Queen Latifah and Missy Elliott and Mary J Blige and Mari Kassinen of Varttina are younger than I am).

I always thought forty plus would be a time when I was still young and lovely, but also more secure, self assured, with lots of things already well sorted out.

A couple of years ago if you'd asked me I'd have said I've made a pretty good start- new home, graduated three years of healing school with well cleansed (not perfect, mind you, just well and regularly cleansed) set of recognized and manageable emotional and spiritual baggage an ordination and a license to heal, went vegan, started exercising faithfully again for the first time in years, found someone awesome to cut my hair, got jobs that really stretched me and that I enjoyed, with six months to stay home and get myself together in between.

Yep. Ready for the next phase.

But after 40 comes 50. And then comes I Feel Bad About My Neck.

There's some serious humor here. I love how she mixes pretty much trivial stuff-- 'Maintenance' such as eyebrows, dye job, skin tags, pedicure, waxing, my purse, and of course my neck-- with the big changes and deep truths of life.

So do not read the rest of my post until you've read the book. It's a series of essays, an easy read. I finished it on my four hour plane trip from Birmingham to Vegas last weekend.

And after you read it, here you go.

Everything is copy, her mother told her. Nobody told me that (unless she told me herself, in Crazy Salad, nearly 20 years ago). But in my writing I have lived by that philosophy ever since I started blogging in 2005.

"When you slip on a banana peel, people laugh at you; but when you tell people you slipped on a banana peel, it's your laugh. So you become the hero rather than the victim of the joke.

I think that's what she meant.

On the other hand, she may merely have meant 'Everything is copy.'

When she was in the hospital dying, she said to me, 'You're a reporter, Nora. Take notes.' It seems to me this is not quite the same as 'Everything is copy.' Although it did to my sister Amy, and she put it into a novel. Who can blame her?"

There's a lot of sadness here, too. I mean, face it. Our parents and our friends start to die. I am not borrowing loss, I promise. But I've made it a habit to think seriously about what I need to accomplish before I die, and what I need to be sure and ask or tell loved ones before they die. One of the things I love most about my mom is that we can talk straight about that stuff-- understand each other, right now, talk about it often and clearly, often with considerable humour, before the throes of illness or unexpected tragedy force our hand.

And since we don't know when we'll die, I've prioritized some of those items-- appreciate and really connect with my little girl is at the very top of the list. Writing a series of letters to her to be sure she gets the information I want her to have so she'll have it just in case I die is probably right under that. Cribbing what I want to keep from my diaries and then burning the rest is way up there too.

But there's also a lot of inspiration.

" Bob looks at me. 'Nora,' he says. 'we can't do everything.'

My brain clears in an amazing way.

Nora. We can't do everything.

I have been given the secret of life.

Although it's probably a little late. "

So what I want to focus on, for my birthday, is the two essays at the end of the book, "What I wish I'd Known" and "Considering the Alternative.

What I wish I'd known, stolen from Nora's notes:

"The last four years of psychoanalysis are a waste of money.

You never know.

The plane is not going to crash.

Anything you think of as wrong with your body at 35 you will be nostalgic for at 45

[for me, I guess, I'll be nostalgic for my post vegan but still mommy body, acquired around 37 or so, and still a source of shame, at least right now, when I'm 47].

At the age of 55 you will get a saggy roll just above your waist even if you are painfully thin. [Thank God! This means I needn't bother trying to be painfully thin! ]

Write everything down.

Keep a journal.

Take more pictures.

The empty nest is underrated.

You can order more than one dessert. [Thank you, Jesus!]

The reason you're waking up in the middle of the night is the second glass of wine. [Just a sec, I

need a refill. But I have xanax. ]

The minute you decide to get divorced, go see a lawyer and file the papers.

Overtip.

Never let them know.

There are no secrets."

Thank you, Nora.

And Considering the Alternative...

I am thrilled to find that Vegas is one of Nora's top five places.

And tickled to hear that denial has been a way of life for her for years.

And life's eternal questions--

"Do you splurge or do you hoard? Do you live every day as if it were your last, or do you save your money on the chance that you'll live twenty more years? Is life to short, or is it going to be too long? Do you work too hard, or do you slow down to smell the roses? And where do carbohydrates fit into all this? Are we really going to have to spend our last years avoiding bread, now that bread in America is so unbelievably delicious? And what about chocolate? There's a question for you, Gertrude Stein-- what about chocolate?"

I needn't even write one sentence about how I ponder these questions every single day, especially when my child is tiny, my job is stressful, I love my domestic and creative pursuits, which as a working mother I ignore, and I still have a chance to have one more baby if I can screw my courage to the sticking post.

Her thoughts on the death of dear friends, her failure to talk to her friend Judy about it before she died, her complete lack of understanding of how her friend Henry's magnificent handling of his own death could be relevant to herself, and most importantly her thoughts on Dr. Hauschka's Lemon Bath, which costs twenty dollars a bottle (I once really had a problem with long, deep, hour long, water wasting baths-- it was a daily thing)--" I use quite a lot of bath oil. More than you could ever imagine. After I take a bath, my bathtub is as dangerous as an oil slick. But thanks to the bath, I'm as smooth as silk. I am going out to buy more. Goodbye. "

-- This is all very, very good stuff.

Stay tuned for my thoughts on Crazy Salad, which really changed my life when my mother gave it to me years ago, tomorrow.

My 21st 25th birthday...

The card my work colleagues gave me...

I couldn't help laughing at the 2 similar messages.

One wrote, "Happy Birthday Jinny. Next yr we go bangkok with ZQ 2 party!"

The other wrote, "Happy Birthday Jinny! Next year we go BKK with Harry!!....."

What's wrong with both of them, these jokers.

.

Birthday treat from gannybun!

It was buffet style and he said I can really eat and drink like a female warrior. Oh well.

.

On actual day after work... (yes I worked on my birthday)

With my family & HH,

If not for my parents, I wouldn't know such a place exists.

Famous for their buffalo wings (quite huge!) with levels of spiciness you can choose from 1 to 10.

Their fried button mushrooms are another of their specialty.

i like their cheesy fries too!!!! Their main courses I would say is normal but portions pretty huge though.

Best of all, NETT prices! No service and tax charges.

.

Double celebration with my pretty 大姐 whose birthday falls on one day before mine.

Lunch @ Waraku.

Pardon my super round face. weight gain!!

.

The very same evening with my favourite SIM mates. Hardly see all of them together at a go these days as we only randomly meet up for lunches /dinners almost a fortnightly basis on weekdays. I'm thankful for them turning up for me!

To think this is already the 5th time I'm celebrating my birthday with them. Just how time flies... it feels so much like my 21st.

@ MINDS cafe

Games after dinner...

Groupie pics! Jasmine, you were supposed to be in here. =)

Hahahaha!

.

Knowing they were going to bring out the cake for me (no surprise!), I hurried to the toilet first and then when I stepped out, everyone in the cafe, in unison, sang Happy birthday to me! It was unplanned. I was standing awkwardly don't know whether to face my friends or to the rest of the strangers in the cafe.

With dear babe Eunice!

With the dudes...

With the babes...

Final group pic!

.

Mum made 鱼头炉 the following day! More of like fish meat than the fish head. haha.

Then later to give me a surprise...

Care bears cupcakes which she preordered a few days before.

I was at prima deli with her one of the past weekends and I casually told her, "Mummy, I want this for my birthday!", pointing at the cupcakes brochure.

She looked at me, "Are you sure? These are just normal plain cup cakes with decorations only leh."

I replied, "Very cute what." Little did I know that she remembered and actually went to order secretly.

Very childish of me I know but how often do I get to eat carebear cupcakes at age of 25?

The decos on the cakes are actually rings! This is how they looked on my fingers.

Wahaha.

And...

Belated stuffs from HH due to his ever "busy" schedule.

Cute child-like cookies!! Really look like as though as a child baked all these. The bears were so cute.

Totally unexpected coz HH nv cooks nv bakes. Really not bad for a first timer. AT least they were edible. hahaha, very touched. These were meant for me to place at my office desk in case I get hungry / sleepy since I eat late lunches.

My colleagues keep eating them instead lor.

And no, he didn't bake this la. =)

Nothing is sweeter than his gestures.

Holly! I'm 25! It just gets better.

While doing my work in the office, he showed up with flowers and chocolate cake. Too bad, we can't be together the whole day on my special day since I am stuck at work. But I promised him that I will make it up to him. Since it is my birthday, I will cook him something delicious for our tonight's dinner - Spicy Spareribs and Red and White Prawns with Green Vegetables. Although he already told me that he will order something and will pick it up but I guess I was challenged to cook something special just for me and him. Making me happy is enough for me right now and later on, I know there will be more surprises! I can't wait!

My Birthday is going to be soon, but I don't know what I'm doing.

I do know instead of presents this year I'm going to ask for donations to a charity of my choice.

I want to invite about half my grade. So that's about 30 people. I want it to be the best party ever. plus I want it to be an active party. You know ultimate Frisbee, basketball, two touch football, and stuff like that.

If you have any ideas on a charity, or a type of birthday I should have, remember it has to be able to have 30 people, leave a comment. Come on I know you want to.

As I'm in an all over the place kind of mood, this is going to be an all over the place kind of posting.

*As I mentioned yesterday, I was tapped to be a contributor over at DCNearlyweds.com.  Well, my first offering went up today, which you can find HERE.  You will find me there from now on posting as Miss JeffMemorial.

*I used to be the girl who would stay up on a weeknight until 3am and still make it to work bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 8:30am.  I am no longer that girl.  I'm not sitting here waxing philosophic about how things have changed now that I'm the ripe old age of 25 years old; it's just interesting how I can see things changing.

*October, while amazing and wonderful, is going to be insanely busy.  October 10th marks the one year mark before the wedding, and that's when a number of things need to start getting done.  October 18th is Patrick's birthday.  October 19th is my mother's birthday.  October 26th is my birthday.  Then we are throwing a big Halloween Costume Party the weekend of the 31st.  N-U-T-S!

*I'm in dire need of a new work tote.  I have a fabulous one I got from Target earlier this year, however it is now being held together with super glue and paper thin hopes and dreams.  I then came across this beauty at Target the other day:

The one in store is this beautiful dark wine color, but that is the style.  It's huge.  It would fit everything... and it's $40.  I carried it around for a good portion of our shopping trip that day, but inevitably I put it back.  I have a graphics design fee to pay and bills out the wahoo.  This is no time to be dropping bank on a purse I really want.  I just wish it wasn't so pretty.

*For every trend, there is a backlash... and for every anti-trend backlash, there is yet another backlash.  At first it was fashionable to debate this election.  Then all the mud-slinging became annoying, so everyone complained about that.  Now it's trendy to be irritated and bored of the election talk, and let me tell you how annoying that is... Wait, no.

*Today I start my new workout regimine with Adventures in Shaw at the helm, in the role of my personal trainer.  The list of things she is having me do is daunting, but I know I can get through it with some great music, and that's what I need: great kick-ass workout music.  The kind that's bounch, potentially embarassing, and I probably know all the words to.  Any suggestions would be more than welcome.

*I realized something awful today.  I can't remember the last time I went on an honest-to-god vacation.  Over the years I've done trips to see friends; the one time last year Chris arranged a vacation for us and our dog, the dog died the first night we were there of bloat.  We spent the remainder of our anniversary in shock and tears.  Other than that, no vacations.  Nothing.  Not one beach trip.  Not one weekend of just getting away from it all.  This must change.  I don't know how, but it must.  I need a vacation.  Oh, wait, I remember my last true vacation... junior year of high school.  That was eight years ago.  Good grief.

*My birthday falls on football Sunday this year, which is really exciting!

*Of all the days I wish I could go to happy hour, it would be today.  Seriously.  It's been one of those days, and I still have a ways to go.  Oh well.

(this is later now) So I went for a run and it was mighty toasty out :) and this big freaky dude started screaming (in Chinese) on the street about how big my boobs were.. lol.. freak.. thought they were exciting bound up in the sports bras.. just imagine the full meal deal.. ok that's all for now.

(more more)

So after an afternoon of sunning myself and talking to my mom on the phone, I taught one class (but it's ok it was games class :D) and then went home and got ready for dinner.  Went to this really nice sushi place called New York Sushi and stuffed my self silly with super yummy sushi and had a really good time with everyone who made it out for dinner.  Thanks, Tracey, Melissa, Jodie, Thaddeus, Emma, Bernadette, and Amanda!  :)   Plus I got some fun prezzies, some new pillows (yeah wanted them) and a new towel (mmm Egyptian cotton) a big awesome bottle of Paul Mitchel tea tree conditioner, plus a really cool blue tooth head set for the computer that Tracey tried to get for me (but the store gave her the wrong ones).  Plus some kids at my school brought me picture and cards they made and some little chocolates...

Plus face book had some serious win today, Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday today :)  I'll be sure to reply to you allsoon! xoxo

Need to finish making my bed and then get into it, tomorrow is my big work day and I better get rested up for it.

“Kung minsan nga, parang gusto ko na ring mamatay…” :cry:

Ahehe... don’t get me wrong. Not in any time of my life na naging “suicidal” or “death-wisher” ako (Ako pa? Ay fighter– “survivor” yata ako!) Na-imagine ko lang, kasi tinanong nya ako nuong nagkataong naka-EMO mode ako. Malagihay pa nga yata dahil sa dalawang bote ng Pale Pilsen (beer) na minamam ko. (What I really mean to say is: “Ano kaya kung namatay na rin ako?” ) :P

Napansin ko’ng natigilan ang mom ko, bumaling ng tingin sa iba. Tapos eun… nangilid ang luha at sisinghot-singhot na.

Marami akong naging alagang mga DAGA (anubayan! hehehe), at hanggang ngayon may siyam pa nga, di ba? Minsan, pag sabay-sabay silang nagno-noise barrage tuwing gabi, napagmumuni-muni ko:

“Hindi kaya naiinip ang mga hamsters ko sa buhay nila? Masaya kaya sila sa monotonous na “gising-kain-IKOT-kain-tulog… gising-kain-IKOT-kain-tulog… (uli)” na gimik nila? Hindi kaya sila nagsisi na ako ang naging “tatay” nila – ako na simula pa nuong ampunin ang kaunaunahang mga ninuno nila, ay wala nang hinangad at ginawa kundi ang maibigay ang lahat ng kaya kong ibigay para guminhawa at maging ENJOYABLE ang kaiiksing buhay nila?” :lol:

(Sa tutuo lang, kung siryus pet-owner ka, siguro minsan nai-imagine mo rin yan.)

Ahehe, alagang daga pa lang iyan… Ay paano pa kaya kung anak mo na?

Wala na sigurong mga katagang dudurog nang higit pa sa PUSO ng magulang – lalo na ng isang ina, kaysa dito, na mamumutawi mismo mula sa mga labi ng kanyang ANAK:

“Sana hindi ikaw ang naging nanay ko!”

“Sana hindi mo na lang ako ipinanganak!”

“Isinusumpa ko ang araw nang ako’y isilang!” (tsk tsk tsk… pangtelEMObela)

Kaya kung ang talagang intensyon mo ay ang pasakitan ang loob ng nanay mo, sumige ka bata – yan ang sabihin mo. :? Baka magsisi ka balang araw? Baka kung kelan tinabunan na iyan sa hukay ay duon ka pa lang makakaisip na ihingi ng tawad ang padalus-dalos na pagsasalita mo nuon? Maski na gaano kalaki pa siguro ang naging pagkukulang nyan sa’yo, nasa hukay ang isang paa nyan nung oras na isinisilang ka. Caesarian daw o? Pilosopo?

Maaaring naririnig mo sa iba na sinasabi sa nanay mo:

“Wala kang kwentang ina sa mga anak mo!”

Kung ayaw mong ipagtanggol ang nanay mo kasi iyon din ang ibig mong sabihin, ay huwag mo nang gagarin pa. Baka naman lola mo iyon na nanay nya, o kaya tiyuhin mo na kuya niya? (Kayo naman kasing mga mas nakatatandang ‘nananaway’, huwag nyo namang sermunan nang harap-harapan yang mga “nanay” pag nandyan ang mga anak nila). Pero kung manggagaling sa anak nya na tulad mo? Ay mahiya ka naman... :(

Kung may nababasa ka mang ‘sermon’ dito na pinagsasabihan ko ang mga iresponsableng magulang, “love letter” ko sa kanila iyon – bakit kasi pinakikialaman mong basahin ang mga personal na liham ko para sa kanila? Bakit hindi ang mga personal “love letter” na sadyang ginawa ko para sa isang tulad mo ang pagbulay-bulayan mo?

Tandaan mo: habang tumatanda ka, mas tumatanda pa rin ang mga magulang mo. Sige, alagaan mo yang grudges mo nang may pagtatanim sa isip mo na “hindi ako magiging katulad ng nanay ko sa mga anak ko.” Baka ma-shocked ka na lang na yang mga anak mo, sa kabila ng pagiging “mabait” kang ina sa kanila ay naging mas masahol pa sayo (o sa nanay mo – eka mo). Bakit? You may not know it, nasasakal mo na pala yang anak mo ng ideyalistikong ‘pagmamahal’ mo sa kanila.

Sa kabilang banda, maaari rin namang napapabayaan mo na sila at hindi nabibigyan ng panahon – dahil sa sobra namang pagluluwag at toleration mo... Either way, ito kayang treatment mo sa mga anak mo ngayon ay bunga ng kimkim na galit mo sa ‘pagkukulang’ sayo ng nanay mo nuon?

May malayooooooo akong mga kakilala (pitong letter “o” yan – talagang super-‘distant relatives’ na, hindi ko na nga makilala sa sobrang layo). Subconsciously (or otherwise), parehong may naging ‘tampo’ sa pagkukulang ng kanya-kanyang ina. Yung isa, apparently mas ‘mabait’ na anak kaysa dun sa isa (Quite similar to the older, ‘non-prodigal’ son sa Luke 15:28-30. You may read Luke 15:11-31 for the whole story). Yung una, may ganitong bilang ng anak; Itong isa, ganuong bilang din sana – kung hindi nagpalaglag. :( Alam nyo bang parang mas titino pang maging nanay itong huli dahil natutong akuin at pagsisihan ang lahat ng sariling pagkakamaling kanyang ginawa? Higit sa lahat, natutong patawarin ang ina sa mga pagkukulang nito. Talaga namang mas disastrous yang hatred kaysa sa anger, di ba?

Ikaw na hanggang ngayon ay galit pa rin sa nanay mo: magiging nanay ka rin. May panahon ka pang ipagpag yang grudges mo, anak…

“Anlabo yata ng title? Hindi ba ‘Grandmother’s day’ daw ang nasa September?”

Sigurado ka? :roll: Alam ko sa October 5 pa yung “Grandsparent’s day.” E di okey-olrayt, huwag alisin yung “Lola’s day” kung mayroon nga nuon sa September. Basta sa akin, malinaw pa rin yung title…

Para sa akin, ang birthday ko ang aking first and foremost “Mother’s day.”

“ Honor your father and your mother… ”

– Exodus 20:12

“ A wise son brings joy to his father,

but a foolish man despises his mother. ”

– Proverbs 15:20

“ There are those who curse their fathers and

do not bless their mothers. ”

– Proverbs 30:11

JESUS HIMSELF said these two verses:

“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

– Mark 11:25

“All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.”

– John 6:37

Bagong gising ako… at least hindi na mukhang ermitanyo (sabi ng nanay ko). :lol: Dumating sya kahapon, pero umuwi na rin kaninang umaga... Si Choi (misis ko) ang nagpikyur sa amin ng mom dito.

Yup, tomorrow is my birthday. I will be turning 29 years old. I thing I will stay at 29 for a long long time. :) What do you think? Twenty nine is a good number, right?

A little annoyed though and even though I still have one day left (tomorrow) I've only received one birthday card. Yeah, I'm throwing myself a pitty party!

Thank you to my dear friend who did think of me and send the card out early and I already received it yesterday. Thank you!!!

I know my parents and my sister will be sending or already sent the cards out, but it kind of depends who sent them out. My parents have been staying at the summer house all summer and they are still there. They don't come to the city too often, so it could be that my mom asked my sister to get a card from them. The thing is with my sister, she's ALWAYS late sending them out. So I'll probably end up getting it sometime next week, or the week after that. Agh, I guess as long as I get it.

And to all the other family members, well, I don't know. At the moment I'm thinking that I probably won't be sending them Christmas cards, and for those that have birthdays between now and Christmas, they won't be getting a b-day card. Yeah, sounds mean, but that's how I feel at the moment. I'll probably get over it and end up sending all the cards out, but sheesh people, is it hard for you to send me one card?

It's not like I'm asking them to come see me, or take me out for lunch, or dinner. They live thousands and thousands of miles away, in a different continent. They should send me a card and make sure I get it on time, not a month later.

Maybe I should call, text, e-mail them all a month before and let them know, that it is time to get a card and send it out. On average, it takes about 2 weeks for me to get it.

Blah.

I guess I could still get it tomorrow. We'll see.

Oh, the Princess is coming down with something. I swear, we can never avoid any kind of cold/bug/what-ever-you-want-to-call-it. So now she has a cough and a snotty nose. Oh, and wait, I think I'm feeling something too. Great! Just in time for my birthday. I might as well start getting drugged up now.

We are planning on going out to dinner. Probably Red Robin since it is kid friendly and they do pretty well there. After that, I don't know. Maybe walk around the mall. Maybe I'll go to Victoria's Secret and get something there. I did get a gift card to VS from that same dear friend who's card I already received. I really could just stay home and do nothing, as long as we are all healthy.

I'll let you all know what we'll end up doing. Goodnight!

There's nothing like friends and humor to make a birthday special. Thank you!!!

But back to my birthday, since it's not my daughter's turn until next month. I have to work today, so I won't be actively celebrating. I baked a cake and will take it to work with me this morning. It is my way of thanking my colleagues for their help and support thus far. Early evening I'm on duty for a few more hours, but that's it. I'm off for the night. A close friend or two might stop by, but no big deal.

Since it's my birthday, I can do whatever I want. (As long as I don't get into trouble!) So I'm going to share a song that changed my life. Back then, I was 16 years old. Not just this one song changed my life, but it's how I found my heroine. It was her first and only hit record, a song she co-wrote with Bruce Springsteen. Thank God she had this hit! Otherwise, I never would have heard about her out there in the boondocks! This is a more recent version, but at the bottom I've included the original version.

Since I have no idea how long I'll be around, or how long it will take me to finish all my projects, let me just enjoy today. I am happy to be alive. Happy to know so many wonderful people. Happy to know true love. Grateful for my family and relatives. Happy to have two wonderful, healthy children, whom I love dearly and who manage to drive me crazy at times, just to keep me on my toes. Happy to have two cats to cuddle. And I have dreams for the future. I'm not finished yet.

Because the Night

take me now baby here as I am
pull me close, try and understand
desire is hunger is the fire I breathe
love is a banquet on which we feed

come on now try and understand
the way I feel when I'm in your hands
take my hand come undercover
they can't hurt you now,
can't hurt you now, can't hurt you now
because the night belongs to lovers
because the night belongs to lust
because the night belongs to lovers
because the night belongs to us

have I doubt when I'm alone
love is a ring, the telephone
love is an angel disguised as lust
here in our bed until the morning comes
come on now try and understand
the way I feel under your command
take my hand as the sun descends
they can't touch you now,
can't touch you now, can't touch you now
because the night belongs to lovers ...

with love we sleep
with doubt the vicious circle
turn and burns
without you I cannot live
forgive, the yearning burning
I believe it's time, too real to feel
so touch me now, touch me now, touch me now
because the night belongs to lovers ...

because tonight there are two lovers
if we believe in the night we trust
because tonight there are two lovers ...

Aritmetik, matematiks :roll: … pareho lang ba ito?

1. Almost age seven, first time kong nakipag-smooching sa isang playmate na 6-year old girl (yung batang may “bangs” pag ni-CLICK nyo yang pikyur). :oops: Huli kami ng tita ko, sya pa yata napahiya. Medtech student sa Centro Escolar nuon ang auntie ko; maski konti siguro, may basic syang alam sa child psychology.

Alin? Kung yung mga super-legalistic at hyper-konserbatibong matandaang inilalagay ang malisyosong pananaw nila sa pag-iisip ng isang inosenteng bata ang nakakita nun, magdyowang sampal na siguro inabot ko; kung nagkataon, ano kaya ang naging impact nuon sa paglaki ko? Hindi pa ako tumutuntong ng grade I (hindi pa uso ang kinder nuon), at sa tutuo lang, wala naman akong naramdamang miski ano sa ismol pang pututuy ko nuon, pramis. Siguro may napapanuod lang ako nuong mga kissing scene sa TV, ginaya ko lang.

2. Edad disisyete, nakapasa ako sa UPCAT.  At sa Pamantasan ng Pilipinas sa Los Baños, 9 years na nagpakadalubhasa sa apat-na-taong kurso.

Aywan ko ba... nagta-TOP ako sa math at trigonometry nung hayskul, kumbakit naging pinaka-ITLOG ko ang Calculus nang mag-college.  Six units yun nung Forest Products Engineering pa ang kurso ko, Maths 26 and 27 ang course title.  Ibinagsak ko yung Math 26, pwes nagretake ako – naka 3.0 naman (yehey). Nung nag-shift ako sa DevCom, hindi required ang Calculus dito sa bagong kurso ko. :mad:

3. Edad __, hired agad ako sa isang permanenteng trabaho nung nagdaang taon, at ‘nagpakabusabos’ duon bilang isang “public servant” (?). (dyok lang, baka may dati akong bossing na mapikon). Kailangan kong i-blur dahil kasama ko ang aking 2nd ex-GF(?) dito sa litrato (in white shirt).  Break na kami dito :( ; ito yung pangalawang punta ko sa kanila para suyuin sya.  Sa dalawang naging ex ko, sya ang naisama ko na sa bahay, kahit pa less than two months lang kaming mag-on; “tita” na nga ang tawag nuon sa kanya ng unang pamangkin ko.

4. Edad __, sampung taon ko nang nakakasama ang naging misis ko (two years as steady, eight years as wife).  Sarap pag ganitong bakasyon (malayo sa trabaho) kung kailan namin nagagawang lumuwas ng Maynila mula Nueva Ecija para makipagharutan sa mga pamangkin ni misis.  Kino-cross stitch ni misis dito ang ireregalo ko sa kaibigan kong Pinoy US navy na na-meet ko sa Okinawa.

5. Edad __, custom framer, pastol ng mga hamster. :lol:

“Mas mayaman pa ang aking mga daga” (kapus-atiks daw, eka) – it’sokey lang, basta ‘malaya’… :D

Bagong-tasa itong nasa kaliwa; bunga naman ng pagiging adek sa kaba-blog yang nasa kabila.  Hindi iyan nakakalbo, dati nang malapad ang noo.

Naibida ko na nang pahapyaw kung papano akong sumulpot sa mundong ibabaw. Idagdag ko na lang na hindi lang ako basta iniluwa nang “suhi” – isang paa ko lang ang naunang lumabas. Alangan namang hilahin yun, diba? – magkakandampisak ang :oops: … Kaya ipinasok daw uli ang aking paa para pagsabayin dun sa isa pa.

Lumabas daw akong halos ‘nangangasul’ na, hindi umiiyak o humihinga. Itiniwarik ako ng komadrona, hinataw sa pwet... (SPLAK!) Palahaw ng iyak si homebodybabyboy. Kaya sa aming magkakapatid, ako ang pinakabatang nakatikim ng palo!

Eto pa: May pamahiin ang mga matatanda sa amin na ang ‘inunan’ daw ng isang sanggol na ipinanganak (placenta) ay hindi dapat itinatapon sa kung saan-saan lang. Mas maganda raw kung ibabaon yun sa lupa, sa ilalim ng hagdan ng mismong bahay para hindi maging “layas” yung bata paglaki.

Oe batet tanun? :roll: Yung inunan ni 1^st brother ko, ganun ang ginawa, pero sya pa ang naging pinaka-‘layas’ at adbenturero sa aming lahat; samantalang yung sa akin, itinapon lang daw (ng Lolo ko yata) sa ilog ng Olongapo at hinayaang anurin duon? (Nakarating kaya ng Subic bay?)

At alam nyo bang hanggang ngayon hindi ko pa maharap ipabago ang entryng “female” sa birth certificate ko?  Ahe, ibinase kasi ng nag-type sa first given name ko, kaya eyun.  Sabagay, affidavit for correction of entry lang naman daw iyon.

Tungkol naman sa pagiging suhi… mahusay daw kaming manghilot ng mga nati-tinik sa lalamunan. Sabagay, pagkarami nang natinik na lumapit sa akin nuon, at mukhang ‘natanggalan’ ko naman. At ako mismo, bihira rin matinik, at kung mangyari man, dinededma ko lang.

Naalala ko nung ilang buwan pa lang kaming ikinasal ni misis… nagdadadahak? – akala ko naglilihi! :D Natinik laang pala. :cry:

Sinilip ko ang lalamunan, may tinik nga! Malalim ang kinaruruonan, at mukhang hindi abot ng dalawang daliri ko o kaya ng tyani. Kumuha ako ng long-nosed na plais… O, nganga uli... Hinugot ko… di tanggal si tinik! Ano bang suhi-suhi?

Ang praktikal na advise daw sa mga natitinik ay ang paglunok ng kanin nang hindi nginunguya (ingat lang baka matanggal nga ang tinik, mabulunan ka naman). O kaya, saging ang lunukin mo... Ingat uli, kasi may kakilala akong lumaki ang bibig dahil sa kakakain ng saging.  Pahalang naman kasi kung isubo nya ang saging, hindi pahaba. :lol: (Gets nyo ba? Basta hindi bastos joke na yan. Kung DI naisplukan, esplika ko sa baba.)

Ganito yun:

1. Balatan mo si saging.

2. Humarap ka sa salamin.

3. Tapat mo “sideward” o patagilid ang saging sa bibig mo – as in yung kurba nya e parang abut-tengang ngiti mo.

4. Ganun mo isusubo ang saging.

Nakakalaki yan ng bibig (gets na?)  ... ewan ko kung makakatanggal ng tinik.

Personally, ang aking advise: Pag feel nyo pa lang na matitinik kayo, huwag nyo nang pansinin... tuluy-tuloy lang ang kain, at hayaang matangay ito ng mga susunod na isusubo nyo (Ahe, tiyakin nyo lang na WALA nang tinik dun sa mga susunod na isusubo nyo). Kasi pag pinansin nyo, nako-conscious lang kayo at nagiging tense ang lalamunan nyo, lalo lang nababaon ang tinik.

Ahehe... bakit nga ba tayo napunta sa subuan? As if naghanda ako at mag-iimbita sa isang kainan! Tama na siguro ang kwentong yan... Basta I just made my point: bobo nga ako sa aritmetik o matematiks, hasler naman ako sa “alis-teniks.”

Babay! ;) Sa mga “susunod ko” ko na lang uli hahabaan (bata pa naman ako).

Hmm… Kantahan ko na lang ang sarili ko… at tutal, pet blog ito:

♫ Haberdey tu mi

I belong to the tree

With the pussy and the teddy

And my small rich hammies. ♪

Berdey ko ngayon, and I feel like I’m just 17! :)

P.S. (pwedeng laktawan ▼ kase... mas mahaba!) :lol:

Nakumpleto ko na pala ang lahat ng short account ko tungkol sa mga taong pinakamalalapit sa puso ko – magmula sa mga lolo at lola ko, thru my dad and mom, tatay at nanay – isama mo na rin ang mga peborit kong auntie, uncle at lolo uncle.  Ang aking bestfriend, meron din. At syempre, hindi pwedeng wala si misis ko. ;)

Ang birthdays ng limang kapatid ko, nai-post ko na rin. Click nyo lang ang kani- kaniyang portrait sa ibaba.  More or less, 17-year old ang bawat isa nung magpa-pikyur nyan. Yung sa akin, huwag nyo na i-click, kasi baka IBA ang bumulaga… :lol: Syempre nandito ka na sa birthday ko e.

Ay bakit korteng “krus”? eka nyo siguro…

Kung pinagtyagaan nyong basahin ang aking post entry about my 2^nd brother, may nabanggit ako duon tungkol sa kaapelyido namin na na-meet nya sa PMA (1984). Nabanggit ng isa ruon na ang surname daw namin ay galing sa isang rootword na ang ibig sabihin yata ay crossing o “crossroads”? Hindi ko alam kung panong nangyari yun?  Basta yun daw ang sabi, e maski naman anong research ko ay wala akong makitang rootword nuon. :lol: Eniweys, buti na nga lang hindi naging “Cruise” apelyido namin.  Ayoto nun, naglulubugan na ang mga barko natin ngayon.

Incidentally, in my “Krus” post, isang ka-blog ang nagbigay ng sariling kahulugan sa krus, na sa loob ng mahigit 20 years ng aking pagiging isang born-again christian ay nuon ko lang narinig at na-realized ang taglay na katotohanan. :)

Choices sa buhay, at apat ang obvious na direksyon – sabihin na nating pa-hilaga o pa-timog, pa-silangan o pa-kanluran – i-disregard na natin yung pataas o pababa... Sa madaling salita, gawin na nating nakahiga ang krus, tutal ito nama’y matagal nang naitumba mula sa pagkakatindig nang ang sumpa nito’y napagtagumpayan na ng ating Manunubos, halos dalawang libong taon na ang nakararaan.

Saan ka ba nanggaling?  Puti ka ba o itim? Dilaw o pula kaya? O kayumangging maligatna – eheste, kaligatan? No big deal!

Pang ethnic minority ba ang hitsura mo, o kaya’y taal na aborigine ka ‘lang’ kaya inggit na inggit ka sa mga tisoy o tisay? So what? Ang pagiging ‘magaling’ o henyo ay wala namang pinipiling lahi o angkan… At lahat ng nilalang, may “choice” para maging anak ng Maykapal, hindi kinapal Nya lang.

Ordinaryong tao lang kaming magkakapatid (marami nga dyan sa inyong di hamak na mas magagaling pa); kung matagal na kayong ‘suki’ ng blog ko, alam nyong wala kaming gaanong alam sa nuno naming ‘pinanggalingan.’ Ahehe, maano ba?

Narun na ko, dapat lumingon sa pinanggalingan para makarating sa pupuntahan. Pero higit na mas mahalaga kung saan ka patutungo kaysa sa kung saan ka nagmula. Ang mga kapatid ko ay mga pangkaraniwang tao lang na sa iba’t-ibang pagkakataon (and in His own sweet time) ay nakakilala kay Hesus bilang Tagapagligtas at Panginoon.

“Napaka-self-righteous mo naman, homebodyhubby! :?

Bakit kailangang ang mga kapatid mo ang ieksampol mo para i-illustrate ang mga Biblical truths na pinagsasasabi mo?”

Sino pa kaya ang dapat kong ieksampol nang hihigit pa sa mga taong lubusang kilala ko para makapagpatotoo? Kung sila na ngang mga kilalang-kilala ko na, ayaw mo akong paniwalaan, hindi kaya mas lalo kang magdududa sa mga “pinagsasasabi” ko dito kung ang ineksampol ko ay yung mga taong hindi ko kilala? Paulit-ulit ko na ngang sinasabi sa mga nakaraang posts ko na HINDI galing sa aming sariling “galing” ang eka mo'y mga “ipinagyayabang” ko dito. Okey, see what you want to see; believe what you want to believe, choice mo yan.  Malaya kang hindi makinig o maniwala.  Hindi kasi ubrang yung mga gusto mo lang na mabasa ang isusulat ko dito.

Kung hindi mo kayang gawin ang “kapahangasang” kayang gawin ng iba – either takot ka, nahihiya, hindi mo pinahahalagahan ang mga sinasabi nila, or plainly hindi mo alam ang sasabihin dahil hindi mo naman trabaho ang gayun – huwag kang ma-insecure, wala kang dapat ipangamba.  Huwag mo silang husgahang palalo o ipokrito. Nakakarelate ka ba sa sinasabi nila dahil nasasapul ka? Huwag mo silang sisihin at pagbintangang pinatatamaan ka. Malay mo ba kung trabaho nila yun mula pa nung bago ka makapakinig sa kanila? Kung papaano ka nag-uubos ng gintong panahon sa anumang ‘pinagkakaabalahan’ mo ngayon, kesyo makadiyos pa iyan o makabayan, o makatao o makapamilya man, o simpleng pagkakalat lang ng iyong katarantaduhan o kalandian, ay hayaan mong gawin ng iba ang gusto nilang gawin sa buhay (o blog) nila. Hindi ka siguro maniniwala dahil ang alam mo lang na trabaho ay yung may katapat na SWELDO.

Accountable ang mga nangangaral sa ginagawa nila; Diyos na ang bahala.  As far as what I am writing here is concerned, alam ko ang ginagawa ko, and I am READY and WILLING to pay the price for what I am doing. Sa ganang akin, I want to give all the glory back to God.

Kung ikaw ay isang kristyano, wala nang makababawi pa sa’yo sa ligtas na kalagayan:

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

– Romans 8:38-39

Pero HINDI ito nangangahulugan na hindi ka na pwedeng magkamali o magkasala. Maski born-again ka pa!  We are souls that are still trapped in these YET imperfect bodies, a perfect battleground for good and evil.  That is why our spirit should be controlled by HIS Spirit. (CLICK for this post) and it is your choice whether you want to follow His will or not.

Nanduon pa rin ang choices… ang iba’t-ibang “landas” na maaaring pagpilian… Ang dalangin ko lang: anuman ang landas na iyon o “sanga” na nagmula sa krus, nawa’y hindi ito palayo sa Kristong Hesus na ipinako, namatay, inilibing… at MULING NABUHAY alang-alang sa mga taong kikilala sa kumpletong gawaing TINAPOS na Nya sa KRUS.

Ikaw, hahayaan mo bang pagdesisyunan ng nakaraan mo kung magiging ano ka? At hahayaan mo bang iyan din ang maging excuse ng mga susunod na salinlahi mo: ang sisihin ka para bigyang-katarungan ang magiging kapalaran nila? Baluktot na pangangatwiran? (Katwiran = katuwiran... Bobo ka man sa math: Katuwidan ╪ Kabaluktutan) Ay wala nang katapusan iyan! :(

“Na-tats naman ako! :cry: O… e bakit nga pala pikyur mo nasa gitna? Ibig bang sabihin perpekto ka na?” :mrgreen:

Hindi a… ano ako, diyos? Para namang wala akong mga posts dito na sa minsang buset ko ay nagagawa ko ring magsulat ng mga pagmumura. NAKAKAHIYA!!! :oops: Delete o i-private ko na lang kaya?  Ahehe, tama na nga ito… berdey na berdey ko.

I’m stuck! in the middle of the cross, as if impasse, kasi with regards to my earthly future, stop na sa akin ang legacy ng tatay ko – wala na akong ipapamudmod na mala-wolverineng lahi na magkakalat ng genetically mutated chromosomes ko. :lol: “Bobo (nga) ako sa math” – hindi na makakapag-multiply? (website yun, ala-prendster)

Kaya yung equation sa itaas, hindi tumatandang paurong ang ibig sabihin nun. :lol: Bobo lang talaga ako sa math!

“ In regard to evil be infants,

but in your thinking be adults. ”

– 1 Corinthians 14:20

Sa mga pamangkin ko… isama ko na rin ang mga pamangkin ko sa tita Choi nyo:  Alam kong nagbabasa kayo ng blog ko, olrayt lang kung matipid kayo sa kumento. Si Gigi, kako-comment lang dito sa blog ko kagabi. :D

Pa-berdey blow-out ko senyo: Pagpalain kayo ng Panginoon!

Huwag kayong “manlalamig.”  PABALIK na kami ng mga tatay at nanay, daddy at mommy, papa at mama nyo.  Ang ilan sa inyo ay malalaki na, upang kayo na ang  mag-ukit ng inyo-inyong kasaysayan; Makikinig sa mga kuya nyo. ;)

Kung may problema kayo, huwag mahihiyang magsabi sa Tito Arleen/Robert nyo.  Kung may kapalpakan kayo :lol: maghanda nang makinig sa mapang-unawang mga “sermon” ko. ;)

Eyun lang... sige, mag-aahit muna ako.  Papunta dito ang Lola nyo – baka ma-“sermun”-an ako pag nakita na naman ang ermitanyong hitsura ko. :oops:

( Hiking ulit sa December? :roll: sabi ni kuya Dominic, Mt Pulag naman daw? )

23 tahun yang lalu tanggal 17 September 1985 seorang bayi lelaki telah dilahirkan di Gual Periok, Pasir Mas Kelantan. Jam 730 pagi suaranya memecah keheningan suasana. Akhirnya setelah 9 bulan 9 hari, anak bongsu pasangan Abah dan Mama itu selamat melihat alam ciptaan Maha Esa.

Dia bersyukur. Kerana Tuhan masih memberikan peluang yang terlalu banyak ini untuk dia menebus segala dosa silam. Masih diberikan kudrat menghitung hari-hari kematangan.

23-terlalu besar nilainya pada dia. 23-melambangkan jauhnya sudah dia meninggalkan zaman kanak-kanak dan remaja.23-simbol semakin suntuknya masa untuk dia mengejar impi dan cita-cita.

Ternyata, sejarah hidup banyak memainkan peranan dalam mengendera kehidupan nya sehari-hari. Dia akur, sejarah hidup yang lampau-tidak kira manis ataupun pahit-menjadi panduan berguna buat dirinya. Siapalah dirinya tanpa kenangan lalu yang terlalu banyak mengajar dan mendidik hati dan jiwa agar gagah sentiasa mendepani dugaan semasa.

Namun, setelah 23 tahun lamanya hidup. Keazaman dan kekuatan sesekali sirna dan hilang. Berkali dia cuba bertahan, akhirnya rebah jua di halaman. Halaman yang penuh kelemahan.

Dia mungkin seringkali berkata.Tiap tahun bulan minggu minit saat dan ketika. Berjanji pada dirinya sendiri jua orang lain agar berubah menjadi lebih baik.Untuk semua.Supaya gembira bersamanya.

Alahai..kenapalah tidak pernah tertunai hasrat dan harapan untuk dia melakukan perubahan. Apakah dia seorang yang keras dan degil sehingga kekal menjadi manusia yang membosankan.

Dia tahu, kehadirannya sering tidak menyenangkan.Tingkahnya sering melukakan. Kata-katanya sering menjengkelkan. Mudahnya, dia selalu menyusahkan.Dia tahu itu.

Terima kasih pada yang masih menerima dia begini. Abah, Mama, Ayong, Abg Ayang, KakNgah. Dia hanya hidup untuk kalian. Hanya kalian tempat dia bermanja dan meminjam kasih sayang. Moga boleh dia balas tiap jasa dan pengorbanan.

Buat Mak Cik dan Pak Cik. Terima kasih juga. Bukan niatnya untuk hadir dalam keluarga itu dan merampas kebahgiaan sesiapa. Telah diaturkan Tuhan, dia dipertemukan dengan keluarga yang sangat penyayang. Dia hanya mengutip belas dan ihsan.

Selamat Hari Jadi Shahrul Nizam..

Aku doakan moga kau menjadi manusia berguna buat semua.Moga hidup kau dirahmati Tuhan sepanjang masa.

Ingat dugaan yang bersilih tandang adalah hadiah daripada Tuhan yang harus kita terima.

Maaf buat semua andai selama ini dia tidak menjadi manusia yang digemari. Tidak perlu dihormati dan disayangi. Cuma sekadar teman selagi dirinya masih dibenarkan bermusafir di bumi Tuhan.

Salam..

And it was funny in that I like had a dream that I went back to my mum's house, lol. Weirdd.. ><

I feel soo shit atm. Damn like sickness! Hopefully am better for like tomorrow... where I planned to do some stuff with freinds~ ^^

Aaand also hopefully take some photos too on my new camera! :D

I hate being sick (then again, who does like being sick...??) and urgh, I have like done no uni related work! ><

And I'm going to leave it there and just post this and then probably post again in like ten minutes lol just to say I'm twenty haha..

So my like last 8 minutes being 19... honestly, I don't even like feel 19... guess maybe age is just a number for me..

I dunno. What about you? Do you feel your age? Or it just doesn't even matter to you.

This may also be a first in that I am like sick on/before my birthday.... *sigh* :(

I turned 32 on September 11th. That's right. My birthday is on September 11th. I had a blessing birthday  this year. Several girl friends took me out to eat & drink that day. And I was stuffed for my fancy birthday dinner when my husband took me out. But I was a happiest person on earth. Ya! I just turned 32.

過完了32歲大壽 心裡有一點小小的失落 哎 又老了一歲啦 不過今年生日真的讓我覺得自己是有點被寵壞的 哪有人生日連趕3攤 不但吃了兩次午餐 一次甜點 還被人拖去Happy Hour喝酒 接著晚上老公又帶我去一家氣氛和價錢一樣高檔的餐廳還好我午餐只吃一點點 不然真的太浪費了 呵呵 而公婆除了寄來生日卡之外 還送我一張Michael's的禮物卡 哇 過生日真好

拉～拉～拉～ 正式邁入33歲啦

As you can tell by the title that today is my birthday. I'm 22 years old and Happy to Be A Year Older and live life as a twenty-something for the next 7 years.

That is, after all, what one does on their birthday! 

T

Last week my birthday dinner was horrible. I went out for my party on Saturday, but on the Friday- my mom, brother and I went out for dinner. Here is what happened:

• Our server rolled her eyes when we asked for menus. Because clearly, I should have the mind powers that let me visualize everything on the menu. Oh, and given her impatience with the few minutes it took us to think about what we want, I apparently should also know what I want to order before entering the restaurant.

• I explained I had a wheat allergy and asked if I could get my salad without croutons. She said "of course", as though I had asked if the place served food at all. My salad came with croutons.

• After we were done our salads, I thought I would avoid her turning into the Hulk if I stacked our salad plates/forks so it would be easier for her to take when she came back. She came back and said 'Well, you are going to need to keep your forks". At this point we had no idea who's fork was who's and none of us were wanting to take a chance and guess (my brother is really sick right now and besides not wanting his obvious boy germs, I did not want his sick germs). She rolls her eyes again when we ask if we can just get new forks.

• She brings the forks and THROWS them at the table. I'm not kidding. I had to use football catching skills to grab my fork before it fell off the table.

• We never get our drinks.

• We never get our appetizers.

• When our meal does arrive, mine is fine. My mom's is cold and my brother's manages to be both burnt AND cold. I have never seen my brother refuse to eat a meal (he's like a human garborater) but he really can't choke this down so he tells our waitress. She gives him a look that could kill  Voldemort himself. And takes his plate away without asking him if he wants anything else. Of course, she needs to roll her eyes. Again.

• We still have no drinks.

• We get the bill and there are the appetizers on the bill that we didn't get. I tell her we didn't get them and she rolls her eyes and acts like she doesn't believe me. As though my family is willing to pay $100 on dinner but only if we sneak bruschetta and spinach dip in our purse. My mom is mortified and thinks we should just pay it so we can leave. I refuse. It gets taken off the bill.

Our bill comes to $82.00 and my mom leaves a $100 on the table and is trying to usher us out before we can do something else that will offend our (clearly insane) waitress. I balk and say I want to speak to her manager (my birthday has put me into a mood of importance and I feel like I need to stand up to this bully). I DO talk to the manager who sticks up for the server telling me that 'she's been busy'. I explain that I understand this (as I look around at the half empty restaurant) but that I've never had worse service and that my family was so uncomfortable that we couldn't wait to leave. She stares at me. I pay the bill and leave without putting down a tip.

That's right. I didn't leave a tip. (Or, technically.. my mom didn't leave a tip since it was her money). I ALWAYS leave a tip (especially if I'm paying with other people's money). I've had too many friends work as servers that leaving a tip just was never an idea that crossed my mind. But I was mad. I was mad that she was rude to my family, that she could not come to our table without AGGRESSIVE eye rolling and that she ruined my birthday dinner. So I left no tip.

Today I told my mom that I didn't leave a tip with her money (she never counted back what I gave her to see if I did or not) and she thinks that is wrong. She thinks that all service requires a tip, even if it's just 10% because they get paid so little hourly. Most of the times I agree, but not this time. I tell you readers, it would have hurt my soul to leave a dime for this woman.

So what would you have done? Tip or no tip? Or would you have been so busy thinking about slashing this servers tires that you wouldn't have time to think of any tip business at all?

And what have I learned... don't put it near the edge of the bed or on top of tvs or anywhere where it may fall off and onto the ground! =_=

I never learn, do I!? T_T

I am not as concerned and distraught as the first time because I was smart and zipped all my photos that I had on the external hard drive and saved it onto my computer's hard drive... and I'm not really too concerned what like documents I have lost becuase all that matters is my photos... that are like irreplaceable and I will never be able to like take again... etc. But I do wonder what I have lost other than nearly 5 GB of music and about like a season or two of tv programmes that I have spent endless amounts of time dedicated to their sometimes slow download times.. but oh well. *sigh*  I guess this gives me like a reason to tidy up my music collection... been meaning to do that~

I'm also not very concerned by what methods (i.e. money) that I am going to be getting another one... first one I paid for (with my OD - overdraft.. ) and the second one my mum paid for...  I have an inkling that she probably won't be paying for this third one... maybe half....? But yeahh... not quite sure how I am going to go about this.... hmmm.

Soo. Onto other stuff. I am sick. Third or fourth day into it. It began with an awful itchy and sore throat and then escalated into a sniffling and.. I won't go into the details but yes, a sniffling nose and dreadful and quite painful cough and now just sniffling nose and occasional coughing...  was coughing like there was no tomorrow yesterday! Jeez!! T_T And it was my birthday as well! T_T

And yes, yesterday was my actual birthday and I actually went and hung out with friends from my Chinese class despite the fact that I was sick and probably shouldn't have been out... but hey, colds are the result from being inside too much.... as I read. Somewhere.. but yeah.. I kind somewhat have been inside the past few days... but yeah, that's another story~

On my actual birthday I had lunch with Nikki and Robin at Momo tea ^^ it was nice... but didn't finish it.. =\ Good value for $10 though! Then we went and got sticker photos~! (Soo typically asian, haha - well then again, we are studying chinese and like 2/3 of us are asian haha, soo it's all good :D) After that we walked around trying to find a karaoke place coz the place that we were going to go to wasn't open.. found another near downtown and it was pretty good ~ $30 for 1 hour.. :)

It was a great day! Despite again that I was sick and coughing like craaazy! :( That wasn't fun. The karaoke place was pretty awesome too.. there was like disco lights haha.. The place is pretty decent as well! Pretty recent song choices... I sung a few songs that I usually sing like A Whole New World (awesome song! Pretty much know all the lyrics~ haha xD) and some other stuff... sung Angel by Shaggy (I surprised myself by actually by being able to sing it hahaha) and The Great Escape. Another really awesome song! I like it. :D Yeah it was a good day ^^

Oh. Damn... this compiling and re-creating of my music library again... urgh! >_< I haaate it! I think I need some help haha.. I'm going to enlist help in getting my friends to send me music via MSN hahaha. Oh, the offer is extended here too... if you feel like helping the cause of making Maggie's iTunes fat and healthy again... you know where to find me! :D All donations greatly appreciated! ^_^

And, that is all for now~ hope everyone is doing fine and for those on holiday, enjoy it while it lasts... while I spend the last of mine sick and having not much energy to do much other than lurk on the net.... *sigh* Also gotta get my icommunicate powerpoint done.... T_T It is due almost exactly a week from now... =_=